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Me and my girlfriend, both 20, have been together for 13 months now, living together for 12. We get along great, never argue or fight, have similar interests, etc. However, our relationship has come to a standstill, physically, and I am bored.

To sum it up, she has a 12 year olds mind-set of sex. She refuses to make out, thinking it's gross, has no sexual interests what so ever, is never aroused, and claims she has never masturbated.

The problem is, I have talked to her about this three times now. The first time, she wouldn't tell me what was wrong, and why she had no interest in anything sexual. The second time, she told me she doesn't know how to fix what is wrong.

So now, the third time, I suggested her several ideas to correct the problem, mainly, that she needed to become more comfortable with her own sexuality, and I suggested she sat down and determined what turned her on, then moved to masturbating, etc.

But since I talked to her about that, she's pissed off and is ignoring me.

All I want is her to be able to talk about sex, and engage in mutually enjoyable activity's; making out, groping, mutual masturbation, oral, anything along those lines. I could give a **** less about sex, but damnit, I need some sort of physical contact and she's refusing to even discuss my needs.

Suggestions?

Me and my girlfriend, both 20, have been together for 13 months now, living together for 12. We get along great, never argue or fight, have similar interests, etc. However, our relationship has come to a standstill, physically, and I am bored.

To sum it up, she has a 12 year olds mind-set of sex. She refuses to make out, thinking it's gross, has no sexual interests what so ever, is never aroused, and claims she has never masturbated.

The problem is, I have talked to her about this three times now. The first time, she wouldn't tell me what was wrong, and why she had no interest in anything sexual. The second time, she told me she doesn't know how to fix what is wrong.

So now, the third time, I suggested her several ideas to correct the problem, mainly, that she needed to become more comfortable with her own sexuality, and I suggested she sat down and determined what turned her on, then moved to masturbating, etc.

But since I talked to her about that, she's pissed off and is ignoring me.

All I want is her to be able to talk about sex, and engage in mutually enjoyable activity's; making out, groping, mutual masturbation, oral, anything along those lines. I could give a **** less about sex, but damnit, I need some sort of physical contact and she's refusing to even discuss my needs.

Suggestions?

Ummm...have you guys never done it?

Anyway, here's my piece of advice. She clearly has some problem. You're 20, you're probably not going to marry her, so it's not your responsibility to fix her. This is something I've learned the long and painful way. People are hard (but not impossible!) to "fix", so don't even think about it unless you're going to be spending your whole life with her. Otherwise, you will pour a bunch of angst into (probably unsuccessfully) changing her, you guys will eventually break up, and you will kick yourself for doing all that hard work and not getting to reap the benefits if there even were any. Trust me.

From what it says, it sounds like you guys are more like friends. I think "saving it for marriage" is stupid, but remotely understandable. Not wanting to kiss is just plain retarded. I would tell her that since you guys seem to only do stuff friends do anyway, maybe you should just be friends.

Reading what you later wrote, my answer still stands. She doesn't want to act like a girlfriend, so why date her? There are plenty of great girls who actually want to be your girlfriend.

You stated that she wants to WAIT to have sex. In most peoples minds, mutual masturbation or oral sex are just as intimate as intercourse and should also be saved for marriage. If she doesn't want to, she doesn't want to and you should be able to respect that. I also know quite a few people who think making out is disgusting and only like plain kissing so maybe its just not for her. Respect her needs and what she wants...its really the only option you have if you plan on staying with her.

im sorry, but sometimes you just cant change someone. they have to change themselves, but if they aren't willing to, you just need to move on. part of being in a relationship is the intimacy, which yes includes kissing, touching, and sex. she obviously isn't ready to be in a relationship if she isn't even willing to show how she feels about you. she won't even acknowledge it, so how can she possibly change? personally, i think you may need to bring her to a relationship councilor. she don't know the basics of a relationship. if she refuses to go, you're just going to have to move on. she may never want intimacy. she won't even make physical contact with you, just to make you happy. part of being in a relationship is making sacrifices for the person you love. obviously she isn't ready for that.
i'll wish you the best of luck.

edit: ok so you want to spend your entire life with her. well she needs to talk to someone. you can't go through your whole life without contact. marriage councilor/ relationship councilor sessions could really help.