fishpit.com

i have been a bad person. i m 19 at the moment . 4 yrs back i had met a guy online...he was a flirt..n i didn't trust him but we talked daily n he became a good friends still i didn't trust him..one day he asked for my pictures ,i didn't have any of mine so randomly showed him a picture of another girl...i had downloaded those pics from the net..i didn't care...we talked for a while more n i started liking him..we proposed me one day n i said yes in excitement i n ever realized what i was doing n we got in a relationship..i was happy with him..i showed him those pics because he always thought that i was very pretty but i wasn't...n i really don't know what n why i did that..but i started realizing wt wrong i was doing to him but it was too late..everyday i had a reason not to tell him but then one fine day i told him about my mistake n he left me.During the time i was with him i even showed that fake pic to some of his friends because even he had himself showed my fake pic to them..one of those people whom i showed my fake pic was my current boyfriend..even he is an virtual friend of mine .We had started talking n he was a very good friend of mine n when i broke up with the previous guy he supported me a lot. He even helped me get over him..helped me finding out that he had cheated on me..n i started liking him...we got in a relationship too fast..at first i tried to tell him that a long distance relationship is irrational but he had supported me so much ..i felt like i owe him n i myself liked him..we got together ..had great moments...but then after 7/8 months i confessed to him about the fake pics i had shown him..he was broken..i din want to hurt him more so i didn't tell him that i did the same thing with my previous boyfriend..there were some other things as well which i wanted to tell him but could not tell him straight so made up a story n told him that way...he found it all out..he lost his trust on me..still he accepted me..things were fine for a while..one day he was leaving me saying that both of us don't trust each other..but i seriously loved him like anything..i never want to let him go..i said i do..he asked if i trusted him would i send my naked pic to him..i didn't want him to go so i said i will..i kept asking him if he really wants it n he said yes..i gave him..we both felt awkward at that moment but later it was ok..we had our sex talks..phone sex..i have bared it all for him on cam..did whatever he said...it was a very big thing for me as in our society its considered a sin to do such things but i did because i loved him..still he didn't trust me..he says he loves me..but he has been behaving bad...he tortures me..doesn't let me go out anywhere..makes me crazy..asks me to do stupid things..he made me break my sim card n i do everything whatever he asks me to do just because i want to prove him that am not a bad girl i just did wrong unintentionally n yes i die in guilt so i do whatever he says..He made me text a guy not to message/call me..he has taken away my facebook account..and i listen to everything but if i don't he starts abusing me badly..extremely badly..he has even insulted me saying that i am not a virgin and that i have lost my hymen..we keep fighting everyday..he has stopped caring about me..he doesn't understand me just keeps torturing me..he says he'll stop it when he trusts me again but still he doesn't understand me..He says that i can never complaint against him for torturing me and he has kept all evidences safe with him..i don't even want to complain..i just love him and i don't want to lose him..even he says he loves me...when its going good it's great..but he gets worse when i do something wrong n i tend to do more wrong in such restrictions just to avoid our fights..i am going crazy..i have been losing my parents trust as well..and my world is going crazy..i don't like anything these days...i just sit and cry..he wants to leave me but i can't let him go..even when i do i ask him to come back..and i don't know what to do..i have ruined my life but i love him..i just can't live without him and all these thoughts are killing me..he says i am mentally sick..a pathological liar..that i have bipolar disorder..al lthis makes me more crazy..and now i don't want to live anymore..i have lost all interest..i want to die...please help me out..

i have been a bad person. i m 19 at the moment . 4 yrs back i had met a guy online...he was a flirt..n i didn't trust him but we talked daily n he became a good friends still i didn't trust him..one day he asked for my pictures ,i didn't have any of mine so randomly showed him a picture of another girl...i had downloaded those pics from the net..i didn't care...we talked for a while more n i started liking him..we proposed me one day n i said yes in excitement i n ever realized what i was doing n we got in a relationship..i was happy with him..i showed him those pics because he always thought that i was very pretty but i wasn't...n i really don't know what n why i did that..but i started realizing wt wrong i was doing to him but it was too late..everyday i had a reason not to tell him but then one fine day i told him about my mistake n he left me.During the time i was with him i even showed that fake pic to some of his friends because even he had himself showed my fake pic to them..one of those people whom i showed my fake pic was my current boyfriend..even he is an virtual friend of mine .We had started talking n he was a very good friend of mine n when i broke up with the previous guy he supported me a lot. He even helped me get over him..helped me finding out that he had cheated on me..n i started liking him...we got in a relationship too fast..at first i tried to tell him that a long distance relationship is irrational but he had supported me so much ..i felt like i owe him n i myself liked him..we got together ..had great moments...but then after 7/8 months i confessed to him about the fake pics i had shown him..he was broken..i din want to hurt him more so i didn't tell him that i did the same thing with my previous boyfriend..there were some other things as well which i wanted to tell him but could not tell him straight so made up a story n told him that way...he found it all out..he lost his trust on me..still he accepted me..things were fine for a while..one day he was leaving me saying that both of us don't trust each other..but i seriously loved him like anything..i never want to let him go..i said i do..he asked if i trusted him would i send my naked pic to him..i didn't want him to go so i said i will..i kept asking him if he really wants it n he said yes..i gave him..we both felt awkward at that moment but later it was ok..we had our sex talks..phone sex..i have bared it all for him on cam..did whatever he said...it was a very big thing for me as in our society its considered a sin to do such things but i did because i loved him..still he didn't trust me..he says he loves me..but he has been behaving bad...he tortures me..doesn't let me go out anywhere..makes me crazy..asks me to do stupid things..he made me break my sim card n i do everything whatever he asks me to do just because i want to prove him that am not a bad girl i just did wrong unintentionally n yes i die in guilt so i do whatever he says..He made me text a guy not to message/call me..he has taken away my facebook account..and i listen to everything but if i don't he starts abusing me badly..extremely badly..he has even insulted me saying that i am not a virgin and that i have lost my hymen..we keep fighting everyday..he has stopped caring about me..he doesn't understand me just keeps torturing me..he says he'll stop it when he trusts me again but still he doesn't understand me..He says that i can never complaint against him for torturing me and he has kept all evidences safe with him..i don't even want to complain..i just love him and i don't want to lose him..even he says he loves me...when its going good it's great..but he gets worse when i do something wrong n i tend to do more wrong in such restrictions just to avoid our fights..i am going crazy..i have been losing my parents trust as well..and my world is going crazy..i don't like anything these days...i just sit and cry..he wants to leave me but i can't let him go..even when i do i ask him to come back..and i don't know what to do..i have ruined my life but i love him..i just can't live without him and all these thoughts are killing me..he says i am mentally sick..a pathological liar..that i have bipolar disorder..al lthis makes me more crazy..and now i don't want to live anymore..i have lost all interest..i want to die...please help me out..

i have been a bad person. i m 19 at the moment . 4 yrs back i had met a guy online...he was a flirt..n i didn't trust him but we talked daily n he became a good friends still i didn't trust him..one day he asked for my pictures ,i didn't have any of mine so randomly showed him a picture of another girl...i had downloaded those pics from the net..i didn't care...we talked for a while more n i started liking him..we proposed me one day n i said yes in excitement i n ever realized what i was doing n we got in a relationship..i was happy with him..i showed him those pics because he always thought that i was very pretty but i wasn't...n i really don't know what n why i did that..but i started realizing wt wrong i was doing to him but it was too late..everyday i had a reason not to tell him but then one fine day i told him about my mistake n he left me.During the time i was with him i even showed that fake pic to some of his friends because even he had himself showed my fake pic to them..one of those people whom i showed my fake pic was my current boyfriend..even he is an virtual friend of mine .We had started talking n he was a very good friend of mine n when i broke up with the previous guy he supported me a lot. He even helped me get over him..helped me finding out that he had cheated on me..n i started liking him...we got in a relationship too fast..at first i tried to tell him that a long distance relationship is irrational but he had supported me so much ..i felt like i owe him n i myself liked him..we got together ..had great moments...but then after 7/8 months i confessed to him about the fake pics i had shown him..he was broken..i din want to hurt him more so i didn't tell him that i did the same thing with my previous boyfriend..there were some other things as well which i wanted to tell him but could not tell him straight so made up a story n told him that way...he found it all out..he lost his trust on me..still he accepted me..things were fine for a while..one day he was leaving me saying that both of us don't trust each other..but i seriously loved him like anything..i never want to let him go..i said i do..he asked if i trusted him would i send my naked pic to him..i didn't want him to go so i said i will..i kept asking him if he really wants it n he said yes..i gave him..we both felt awkward at that moment but later it was ok..we had our sex talks..phone sex..i have bared it all for him on cam..did whatever he said...it was a very big thing for me as in our society its considered a sin to do such things but i did because i loved him..still he didn't trust me..he says he loves me..but he has been behaving bad...he tortures me..doesn't let me go out anywhere..makes me crazy..asks me to do stupid things..he made me break my sim card n i do everything whatever he asks me to do just because i want to prove him that am not a bad girl i just did wrong unintentionally n yes i die in guilt so i do whatever he says..He made me text a guy not to message/call me..he has taken away my facebook account..and i listen to everything but if i don't he starts abusing me badly..extremely badly..he has even insulted me saying that i am not a virgin and that i have lost my hymen..we keep fighting everyday..he has stopped caring about me..he doesn't understand me just keeps torturing me..he says he'll stop it when he trusts me again but still he doesn't understand me..He says that i can never complaint against him for torturing me and he has kept all evidences safe with him..i don't even want to complain..i just love him and i don't want to lose him..even he says he loves me...when its going good it's great..but he gets worse when i do something wrong n i tend to do more wrong in such restrictions just to avoid our fights..i am going crazy..i have been losing my parents trust as well..and my world is going crazy..i don't like anything these days...i just sit and cry..he wants to leave me but i can't let him go..even when i do i ask him to come back..and i don't know what to do..i have ruined my life but i love him..i just can't live without him and all these thoughts are killing me..he says i am mentally sick..a pathological liar..that i have bipolar disorder..al lthis makes me more crazy..and now i don't want to live anymore..i have lost all interest..i want to die...please help me out..

i have been a bad person. i m 19 at the moment . 4 yrs back i had met a guy online...he was a flirt..n i didn't trust him but we talked daily n he became a good friends still i didn't trust him..one day he asked for my pictures ,i didn't have any of mine so randomly showed him a picture of another girl...i had downloaded those pics from the net..i didn't care...we talked for a while more n i started liking him..we proposed me one day n i said yes in excitement i n ever realized what i was doing n we got in a relationship..i was happy with him..i showed him those pics because he always thought that i was very pretty but i wasn't...n i really don't know what n why i did that..but i started realizing wt wrong i was doing to him but it was too late..everyday i had a reason not to tell him but then one fine day i told him about my mistake n he left me.During the time i was with him i even showed that fake pic to some of his friends because even he had himself showed my fake pic to them..one of those people whom i showed my fake pic was my current boyfriend..even he is an virtual friend of mine .We had started talking n he was a very good friend of mine n when i broke up with the previous guy he supported me a lot. He even helped me get over him..helped me finding out that he had cheated on me..n i started liking him...we got in a relationship too fast..at first i tried to tell him that a long distance relationship is irrational but he had supported me so much ..i felt like i owe him n i myself liked him..we got together ..had great moments...but then after 7/8 months i confessed to him about the fake pics i had shown him..he was broken..i din want to hurt him more so i didn't tell him that i did the same thing with my previous boyfriend..there were some other things as well which i wanted to tell him but could not tell him straight so made up a story n told him that way...he found it all out..he lost his trust on me..still he accepted me..things were fine for a while..one day he was leaving me saying that both of us don't trust each other..but i seriously loved him like anything..i never want to let him go..i said i do..he asked if i trusted him would i send my naked pic to him..i didn't want him to go so i said i will..i kept asking him if he really wants it n he said yes..i gave him..we both felt awkward at that moment but later it was ok..we had our sex talks..phone sex..i have bared it all for him on cam..did whatever he said...it was a very big thing for me as in our society its considered a sin to do such things but i did because i loved him..still he didn't trust me..he says he loves me..but he has been behaving bad...he tortures me..doesn't let me go out anywhere..makes me crazy..asks me to do stupid things..he made me break my sim card n i do everything whatever he asks me to do just because i want to prove him that am not a bad girl i just did wrong unintentionally n yes i die in guilt so i do whatever he says..He made me text a guy not to message/call me..he has taken away my facebook account..and i listen to everything but if i don't he starts abusing me badly..extremely badly..he has even insulted me saying that i am not a virgin and that i have lost my hymen..we keep fighting everyday..he has stopped caring about me..he doesn't understand me just keeps torturing me..he says he'll stop it when he trusts me again but still he doesn't understand me..He says that i can never complaint against him for torturing me and he has kept all evidences safe with him..i don't even want to complain..i just love him and i don't want to lose him..even he says he loves me...when its going good it's great..but he gets worse when i do something wrong n i tend to do more wrong in such restrictions just to avoid our fights..i am going crazy..i have been losing my parents trust as well..and my world is going crazy..i don't like anything these days...i just sit and cry..he wants to leave me but i can't let him go..even when i do i ask him to come back..and i don't know what to do..i have ruined my life but i love him..i just can't live without him and all these thoughts are killing me..he says i am mentally sick..a pathological liar..that i have bipolar disorder..al lthis makes me more crazy..and now i don't want to live anymore..i have lost all interest..i want to die...please help me out..

i have been a bad person. i m 19 at the moment . 4 yrs back i had met a guy online...he was a flirt..n i didn't trust him but we talked daily n he became a good friends still i didn't trust him..one day he asked for my pictures ,i didn't have any of mine so randomly showed him a picture of another girl...i had downloaded those pics from the net..i didn't care...we talked for a while more n i started liking him..we proposed me one day n i said yes in excitement i n ever realized what i was doing n we got in a relationship..i was happy with him..i showed him those pics because he always thought that i was very pretty but i wasn't...n i really don't know what n why i did that..but i started realizing wt wrong i was doing to him but it was too late..everyday i had a reason not to tell him but then one fine day i told him about my mistake n he left me.During the time i was with him i even showed that fake pic to some of his friends because even he had himself showed my fake pic to them..one of those people whom i showed my fake pic was my current boyfriend..even he is an virtual friend of mine .We had started talking n he was a very good friend of mine n when i broke up with the previous guy he supported me a lot. He even helped me get over him..helped me finding out that he had cheated on me..n i started liking him...we got in a relationship too fast..at first i tried to tell him that a long distance relationship is irrational but he had supported me so much ..i felt like i owe him n i myself liked him..we got together ..had great moments...but then after 7/8 months i confessed to him about the fake pics i had shown him..he was broken..i din want to hurt him more so i didn't tell him that i did the same thing with my previous boyfriend..there were some other things as well which i wanted to tell him but could not tell him straight so made up a story n told him that way...he found it all out..he lost his trust on me..still he accepted me..things were fine for a while..one day he was leaving me saying that both of us don't trust each other..but i seriously loved him like anything..i never want to let him go..i said i do..he asked if i trusted him would i send my naked pic to him..i didn't want him to go so i said i will..i kept asking him if he really wants it n he said yes..i gave him..we both felt awkward at that moment but later it was ok..we had our sex talks..phone sex..i have bared it all for him on cam..did whatever he said...it was a very big thing for me as in our society its considered a sin to do such things but i did because i loved him..still he didn't trust me..he says he loves me..but he has been behaving bad...he tortures me..doesn't let me go out anywhere..makes me crazy..asks me to do stupid things..he made me break my sim card n i do everything whatever he asks me to do just because i want to prove him that am not a bad girl i just did wrong unintentionally n yes i die in guilt so i do whatever he says..He made me text a guy not to message/call me..he has taken away my facebook account..and i listen to everything but if i don't he starts abusing me badly..extremely badly..he has even insulted me saying that i am not a virgin and that i have lost my hymen..we keep fighting everyday..he has stopped caring about me..he doesn't understand me just keeps torturing me..he says he'll stop it when he trusts me again but still he doesn't understand me..He says that i can never complaint against him for torturing me and he has kept all evidences safe with him..i don't even want to complain..i just love him and i don't want to lose him..even he says he loves me...when its going good it's great..but he gets worse when i do something wrong n i tend to do more wrong in such restrictions just to avoid our fights..i am going crazy..i have been losing my parents trust as well..and my world is going crazy..i don't like anything these days...i just sit and cry..he wants to leave me but i can't let him go..even when i do i ask him to come back..and i don't know what to do..i have ruined my life but i love him..i just can't live without him and all these thoughts are killing me..he says i am mentally sick..a pathological liar..that i have bipolar disorder..al lthis makes me more crazy..and now i don't want to live anymore..i have lost all interest..i want to die...please help me out..

oh my god, u have spoiled totally, but how ever u can come out it, i dont think u r the first one experience these things, trust me, u have wonderfull future , u dont have to worry for all these, i know its hard for you to forgot everything
JUST GIVE YOURSELF SOMETIME, U WILL COME OUT OF ALL THESE MESS,
that guy used you, just ignore the past, its never comes back, try to live a present life as much as happy, god gives samething to everyone, dont worry u will have your wonderfull future,
best of luck

oh my god, u have spoiled totally, but how ever u can come out it, i dont think u r the first one experience these things, trust me, u have wonderfull future , u dont have to worry for all these, i know its hard for you to forgot everything
JUST GIVE YOURSELF SOMETIME, U WILL COME OUT OF ALL THESE MESS,
that guy used you, just ignore the past, its never comes back, try to live a present life as much as happy, god gives samething to everyone, dont worry u will have your wonderfull future,
best of luck

GOD SEES THE TRUTH BUT WAIITS. IF U R RIGHT U WILL GET.

all it seems that you feel insecure and you find to love somebody just change your ideology about your self forget your past make your self feel strong and love yourself then others this world is full of lusty people who will love you without any reason for sex be careful stay away from them make friend with nobody but with your mom for sometime get busy in house hold job and moreover LOVE YOURSELF and dont kill yourself because you are very BEAUTIFUL

I randomly came across this & usually don't bother with these questions, but I'll give this one a shot:

Girl, listen up & listen very clearly:

1) No man in the entire world is worth dying over.
2) This guy is playing you (mentally) like a checker's piece. I can't explain the psychology of why, but guys love it when there are women who are obsessed with them. You unfortunately suffer from what the rest of us call 'Low Self Esteem'.

Do yourself a favor and forbid yourself of saying his name or thinking thoughts about him for 14 days.

Day 15 you will be cured.

and remember one last other thing; you're not the first woman in the world that had problems loving a guy who was a total zero. It happens all the time. You have to believe that there's some things you CAN'T CHANGE in people, so don't stay with him thinking that he can change. He absolutely won't. Plus the sound of how possessive he sounds over you is possibly the most frightening; he clearly wants you to continue loving him & being completely consumed and obsessed by him yet live as a free man who gives nothing in return.
--

This is the biggest difference between men & women in my eyes. Woman are much more emotionally driven whereas men are power driven.

Woah, you can not imagine, how hard it was to read all that incoherent text, because obviously, you did not reread it before submitting.
The reason i did read it, is because it felt familiar, in a way.
In response to your question, no your are not bad, just a little weird. You love someone who obviously is not right for you, so well, just let him go. It's gonna hurt as hell, and hurt a long time, but you'll get over it sooner or later (probably as soon as you find a boyfriend).
But yeah, I, myself, am melancholic, pessimistic, self loathing, rather anti-social, my life is also sort of going to ****. My medicine is apathy, because if you don't care, you feel better. Try it out and if it doesn't help, you'll just have to face the emotional condition you're in and wait. Time heals all wounds.